Principles

The importance of eye contact! The eyes are the window to the soul, and when we look into each others eyes our spirits can interact. When we look into each others eyes, we are more human (Hill, 2023). I have been intentionally trying to look into others eyes more and I feel like it has helped others feel more seen and deepened the quality and connection of the conversation.

Look outside yourself and see as He sees. Pray for the Lord to open your eyes to see things you don't normally see (Hill, 2023). 

We each have attachment styles that impact our ability to feel seen and understood (Hill, 2023).  These can have a very large impact on our relationship with others and are important to be explored. The attachment styles include: anxious, avoidant, disorganized, and secure

When you are feeding your baby ( weather you breast feed, bottle feed, etc.) make sure you are interacting with them. Do not let a phone or anything else come between you because this can effect their attachment style (Hill, 2023). 

Family is the order of heaven. It is the good life (Hill, 2023).

The dating and courtship stage of life can sometimes bring fear. We each have many fears about marriage or committing to one person. Satan is the one who has introduced fear into this world. If you are facing unsurety in courtship ask yourself these questions and if your answers are all yes you should keep moving forward. Are you having fun with this person you are with? Are you having real-life experiences together? Do they inspire you to be better? Are your foundational principles lining up (Hill, 2023)?

How to regulate oneself in healthy ways: - cross your arms and legs and practice deep breathing by breathing in 8 seconds, holding it for 4 seconds, breathing out for 8 seconds, holding it for 8 seconds, repeating this for 10-12 minutes. - complete breathing exercise while smelling a lavender oil. -drink ice cold water - vigorously exercise - journal your thoughts and feelings (Hill, 2023). 

Each individual in a relationship needs to be an individual. it is important to work in unity, but we can still keep the characteristics that make us unique.

Motherhood is not a hobby. It is not something you do if you can squeeze the time in, it is what God gave you time for (Hill, 2023). 

Mothers and Fathers have different roles and responsibilities that we learn in the family proclamation. The Lords way is for us to fulfill our divinely appointed responsibilities together.

We must make choices that show respect and love toward our spouses. Trust in each other brings peace in the home.

Our bodies are created in the image and function of God (Hill, 2023). I think it is important to remember that our sexuality was God given.

Your marriage will be blessed if you get on the same page about menstruation (Hill, 2023). This is something that can be uncomfortable to talk about and share, but is very important. It does effect women, and it is important to communicate to your husband how it effects you and what is really happening so that they can support one another.

When teaching children about chastity and sexuality it is important to use the correct terminology. This shows that you are comfortable with this topic and that is not something that is dirty or bad. To go along with that, it is important to use age appropriate language and talk in a way that they can understand (Hill, 2023). ​​

When children are asking about chastity and sexuality, it is important to find the context. Figure out why they are asking and what they are looking for. Let there questions guide how much you share, each child is different and will be ready to learn at a different time. That being said, it is not enough for the only conversations to be happening when they have questions. 3-5 years before a child experiences sexual arousal, they should know the facts of life. make this an ongoing conversation instead of a one and done so they can feel secure and safe.

When teaching children about chastity and sexuality both parents should be involved. Again, this helps avoid shame and fear but can also help you take the conversation to a relational aspect. It is important for a child to understand that chastity isn't a list of don'ts, but that it helps us understand the sacred nature of our sexuality and how they are meant to be shared in a marriage relationship.

This is a very specific scenario that I have seen many times so I thought I would include. Young boys often have their hands down their pants, because they are exploring their bodies and the sensation is pleasant. Immediately telling them to stop can create shame, and although although each situation may vary, the best response at a young age is to distract them. Without even mentioning it help them get busy doing something else. As the young man gets older it, it will be important to discuss masturbation and recognize that it is a pleasant sensation but that it is meant to be shared only in a marriage relationship, not experienced alone (Hill, 2023).

A great way to practice having these crucial conversations is by saying these things to your baby. As you swaddle, hold, and play with your infants you can practice how you would teach your children about chastity and sexuality. They will not understand you but they are still being nurtured and you are able to practice (Hill, 2023). 

You are your child's best source of sexual information. Children deserve to be loved, nurtured, and strengthened by parents who are committed to teaching respect for healthy bodies and moral lifestyle questions are answered with both honesty and reverence (Hill, 2023). 

If you are still afraid of the same things that are keeping you from progressing, it is time to change. You must move forward because there is so much more for you, and nothing left for you there.